Friday, October 12, 2007

Top of the Morning

I love my house first thing in the morning. As D gets dressed for work, he turns on the light to start to wake me up, kisses me goodbye, grabs his coffee and puts the garage door up. That's the sign that all is clear, the clicking of the door, I wait for it every morning and then push myself out of bed, down the hall to my waiting coffee that my husband has thoughtfully made for me. I sit in my kitchen, and in absolute silence, sip my morning fuel and check my emails. No one around to bother me, well, except the cat but all he wants is pet pets and that is okay because he doesn't ruin my train of thoughts. There's no demands, no whining about the 10th injury within 10 minutes of being up. It's just me.

Every night before I go to bed I make sure the house is picked up. Everything is clean, the couches have all their pillows lined up perfectly. The dining room table is clear from all meals from that day. All of Camille's toys have been put in their rightful place, typically hidden out of sight in the end tables next to the couch, thank goodness for the doors as they hide the chaos. The kitchen shows no signs of dirty dishes and the counters shine after a good clean. These little things make my mornings go even smoother and my relaxation even more profound.

In the days before Camille, the days of working outside of the home I would wake up at the very last moment possible, rush through the shower, throw on some clothes, slap on some make up, quickly pour some coffee in yesterday's travel mug and rush out the door to work. Once I had Camille, and it finally sank in that my time was no longer my own, I took my mothers advice to heart and became committed to waking up before her. It's what my mom said she used to do with my sisters and I. Now the mornings that I've slept in late and only get a sliver of that time before Camille wakes up, those days feel rushed and I'm praying for nap time to come quickly. I rush through lunch and barely read Camille a book because I desperately need my time.

I wonder how it will be once Rosemary comes. How long will she take to get on our perfectly planned schedule. Camille is a late riser, at this moment, 7:45 a.m., she is still asleep. I expect her to wake up in about 15 minutes but even then, she likes her time in her room. She'll play for about a half hour before she calls for me, I've trained her this way. Will I incorporate Rosemary into my quiet time which could be our only sliver of Mommy and Baby time? Or will I long for the days, the quiet mornings where the only demands put on me are by an over sized Puma and his purrs?

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