Saturday, May 27, 2006

I do not reject your Christ, I love your Christ. It is just that so many of you Christians are so unlike your Christ. M.K. Ghandi

I am nervous, and possibly a teensy bit scared.

Tomorrow we are going to church. I haven't been to church since the incident and personally I have no desire to return at this point but D really wants to go and feels he needs to go. We go as a family and to me that is important. I have been struggling with this for sometime now and have basically just ignored the issue in hopes that an answer would just come to me like in Solomon's great dream. But I'm not Solomon and God hasn't left any writings on the wall so I've got to move forward on my own. Sometimes I have learned in life that God answers you by saying nothing. And by when he says nothing, we typically don't like that response so we wait for something a bit more pleasant.

I am still very hurt by the actions of those particular individuals. If they truly strive to be Christ like wouldn't they want to seek forgiveness? They are acting out the very reason so many people are turned away from church. There blatent judgment of me for standing against the hypocrisy I encountered and then I had the gall to tell you, dear internet world. They disagreed so wholeheartedly with my viewpoint, they feel I am not the Christian I should be so much so that they have decided to "love me from a distance". How biblical of them.

I steal someone else's thoughts as others tend to speak far more eloquently than I ever can:
"I believe in God, but not in His people. I don't believe in the intolerant and legalistic (crap) that goes on in His name."

So I will be returning but hopefully not entering the ring for another boxing match because I would hate to have to win a war of wills of church.

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