Friday, October 15, 2004

I don't know really how to begin this...the last several days have just all run together. To start, we got the biopsy results back on Tuesday and they revealed that my mom did indeed have cancer, we were at the Oncologist the next day to talk about the options and the type of cancer we had to fight. The good news was that it was Endometrial Cancer, and not Uterus Sarcoma which the cure rate is cut by 50%. Mom's cancer has an 80% cure rate when treated with surgery. Obviously this is the logical route to go, but the most painful route b/c it is invasive. It basically entails a hysterectomy. If treated with radiation alone the cure rate drops by 15% so that is just not a smart route to go for someone mom's age. They can not stage the cancer until after the surgery which means we won't know if it has spread until they get in there. We do know that they can apply a grade to her cancer which is a 2-3, unfortunately that indicates that it is aggressive and not indolent as I was hoping. Therefore she is scheduled for her surgery next Wednesday, October 20. Thursday was spent just organizing all my troops to make sure that mom has care around the clock from the moment she enters the hospital to when she returns home. That also means making sure that Jenn has someone to care for her kids for a week b/c she is on week one of mom's care (she is an RN so this only made sense). By the grace of God our dear friend Amy Ball will be arriving at mom's on Tuesday October 19 and will stay until October 30. This allows us to be with mom during the surgery and her hospital stay and not have to worry about the kids. I will be leaving New York (I returned tonight) on Tuesday, October 19 to be with mom through the surgery. I will then leave VA on Monday, October 25 to return back to New York so I don't loose my job and work for a couple days only to jump back on a plane to go back to VA on October 30 to begin week 2 (my shift) of mom's recovery. So, that is my week in a nutshell, of course this short little update doesn't even begin to touch on these past 5 days. I don't think there are words to adequately describe the emotions that I am feeling right now. My mom keeps on asking me when I am going to stop and cry. So far I have only teared up but haven't really just crashed. Honestly, I think if I stop and concentrate on the events of the past 3 weeks I don't think I would be able to pick myself back up. At the risk of sounding overly dramatic, I am just not going to stop until this newest nightmare is over with. The biggest thing running through my head is just having mom come out of the surgery. That terrifies me. I can't even begin to imagine how I would live my life with out my mom, it would just be the worst pain ever, so I don't like touching that spot. Somehow, somewhere, I will get through this. I am just used to this kind of stuff, what is that Jenn, the bottom always fell out of our basket?? Yep, it did and I am still waiting for it to be replaced.

Well, atleast I am able to post some great pics, as promised, to bring just a little bit of happiness to my overly stressful life. Before the fears of cancer on Monday, we did have a great weekend as we celebrated the girls 5th birthdays. Their little party was just so fun, I am not sure who had a better time, the adults or the kids! I hope you all enjoy them!

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