Monday, May 02, 2005


Where the heck have I been? Geez, I don't even know how to answer that. Last week was extremely crazy, I do know that. I felt so consumed with grief over my friends situation that my problems and concerns just seemed petty compared to what they were going through. I felt so emotionally drained that sitting down to journal seemed like a task far to complicated for me to handle.

Then Jenn that sorta kept me busy. Yes, she kept me away from my obligation of my site, but it was great having her here. Especially since promptly at week 6 the dreaded morning sickness began. Why the heck do they call it morning sickness? Really I think that term is quite misleading to every newly pregnant woman out there. The term is defined as only being sick in the morning, that's it...afternoon and evening is expected to be non-sick hours, right? Really, it's false advertising. Get pregnant, only deal with being sick in the morning and then the rest of the day is all yours to do with it what you want. I feel a lawsuit brewing here folks. And let's talk about boob changes. Didn't know it was possible to outgrow ALL your bra's in 7 weeks. Do you know how uncomfortable it is to wear a bra that is now like 2 sizes to small? So, I am desperately scrounging around for anyone who might be a size larger than me. I refuse to go spead over $20 for a bra that might not fit next month, heck, at the rate I am growing....hmmm, I won't go there, this is a family friendly site, right?

I did reach 7 weeks on Friday though. And then promptly Saturday morning I spotted. Brown blood, just a little but it still makes me feel uncomfortable. The doctor says that I shouldn't worry, easy for them to say since they didn't just miscarry. I haven't freaked out, I have remained calm which is not like me. But, there is not much I can do to control this. I can't beg the baby not to miscarry. I can't hang myself from my feet hoping to keep everything inside. There is not a darn thing I can do and flipping out does me no good. The upcoming ultrasound though will confirm what I am hopefully holding onto. As much as I am whining about the sickness, it is a great reminder that something is still growing inside me.

Okay my dear internet. The poor hubs got into an accident this morning and I am supposed to be sitting her consoling him and instead I am more concerned about you than him! I promise to be a better internet friend this week.

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